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A writer born in Charlotte, NC. Currently based out of Toronto, ON.

Not my Brightest Moment

A project I’ve been meaning to do for some time now is to reorganize the storage locker in the basement of our building. Take all the crap out of the decaying cardboard boxes and put it in plastic tubs – especially since a very large pipe of some kind looms right over our locker specifically.

So I took the measurements, bought the tubs (and guessed exactly how many I needed – woo!) and began sifting, sorting and playing Tetris. I had most of the locker unloaded and was surrounded by stuff…when the lights go out. This is in the basement, mind you. No windows. It’s pitch black except for the baleful red glow of the exit signs. I’m surrounded by concrete, clusters of pipes, and rattling wireframe cages.

Rational Me: Well crap. Now I’m going to have to walk all the way up to my unit and get a lantern. That’s going to be murder. Will my stuff be okay? I guess with the power out nobody can get in here. Double crap – will I be able to get back in here?

Other Me: This is when the zombies come.

I picked my way blindly through the stuff, angry I didn’t bring my phone or its light down because WHY WOULD I NEED IT? I get halfway to the doors and the lights spring back on. Bully. Problem solved. I was about half done on my mission when the lights go out again.

Rational Me: This is stupid. They said they were shutting the water off for maintenance today, not the power.

Other Me: This time it happened sooner. Someone is toying with us. Lowering our guard. WHAT JUST MADE THAT NOISE?

So halfway to the door the lights come on again. I weighed the options of going for the lantern or wrapping up (while also cursing the sick fiend who was toying with me). I decided I could finish and just as I was putting everything away, the lights went out again.

Rational Me: I should’ve gotten the lantern. No more second-guessing – I’m getting it.

Other Me: And a gun. All the guns, actually. And a flamethrower. It’ll light the room AND kill the zombies!

Halfway to the door and the lights kicked back on – as did my memory. There’s no point in lighting up the basement if nobody’s down there. The lights are motion-based, and I was out of range of the sensor until I approached the doors out.

And that’s why I felt dumb today.